another new hospital

First off, it's great to be back at a USA hospital!  Carter had his first appointment at our newest hospital yesterday.  Everything went great!  Our new doctor even knows our old doctor in Portland!  Everyone was so nice and helpful.  A social worker (who I've emailed with several times getting things set up before our arrival) took me all over the hospital showing me where everything is.  It was a very good experience.

Heading in for his appointment

We met lots of new people.  Doctors, nurses, nurse practitioners, social workers, insurance facilitators, etc.  Everyone was so nice and welcoming.  Carter did and great job, of course.  

Thumbs up

This was his second to last lumbar puncture!  He was excited about getting the "sleepy medicine" again.  It all went very smooth.  I even got a printout of his blood counts!  I haven't had one of those for almost a year.  Ah, it's good to be back.

It has officially been over three years since Carter was diagnosed with leukemia.  Wow.  He only has just over three months left of chemotherapy!  It's been a long and crazy three years with a lot of ups and downs.  We have all learned a lot.  I am so overwhelmed with gratitude as I look back over these years.  It's been very hard but we've had the most amazing experiences along the way.  And to see how much Carter has grown through it all is just awesome.  The social worker at the hospital made a comment on how engaging he is.  He is very good at meeting new people and having conversations with adults.  He is incredibly optimistic.  He has a way of finding the good in every situation he is in.  It seems that the harder it is, the more easily he finds something to be happy about.  He is an amazing kid.  As a parent, it's been heart-wrenching to watch my oldest son go through something so difficult.  But he has inspired me and taught me so much about life and what's really important.  I am so lucky.

Our last scheduled visit in France

 The view from our hospital room

A few weeks ago we had our last scheduled appointment at the hospital here.  It feels so good to *hopefully* be done!  Everything went well although my suspicions of the doctors not really understanding what I say was confirmed.  I had asked them about three weeks prior to our appt to send Carter's medical records and info to our new hospital in the States.  They still hadn't by the time our appt came so I asked her again to do it.  I had to have Dennison call her a week later when it still hadn't been done because our new hospital wouldn't let us set up an appt with them until they get that info.  He told her all this and she said, "Oh, I'm sorry I didn't know!"  I had told her all this the week before, I guess she just nodded and said OK even though she didn't understand me.  Haha, oh well, I'm pretty used to not being understood here.  It's mostly taken care of, so whatever.

our hospital for the last year

Next stop, an American hospital!  Woohoo!  I do have a slight fear that I'll be so excited that the doctors and nurses will actually understand me that I won't shut up and they'll have to ask me to keep it down because I'm disturbing the other patients.  I'll let ya know how it goes :)

I'm back in the saddle. And by saddle I mean hospital.

A few days ago was Carter's monthly check-up and chemo visit.  I hadn't been to the hospital in 5 MONTHS!  Last time I could say that was nearly 3 years ago.  But now that my awesome husband is back to full-time school, my break is over.  I was nervous to go back there but Carter showed me where to go and what to do :)  I can safely say that I did not miss that place one single bit.  BUT I did miss being there with Carter while he goes through all that.  He's just an amazing kid.  He's had to grow up quickly and he has embraced his maturity.  I've missed our day of one-on-one time that we get each month.  It was great to spend the day with him and feel my heart swell with pride when the nurses comment on how great he is.  "Tres bien!" they say.  Ah, I just love him.
And we reached a sort of milestone this time around!  This *should* be (if all goes according to plan...) his last lumbar puncture with chemo in his spinal fluid at this hospital!  He still has two more chemo appointments here but just through his IV.  And he'll still have 2 more lumbar punctures before he's done with treatment in April but we like to celebrate any milestone that we can come up with.  He really likes the way they do it here though because he likes the laughing gas they give him.  He literally did a double fist pump and yelled "Yay!" when they wheeled in the canister for it.  Haha, silly boy.

 
We've been doing homeschool..  He would rather be at "real school" but he's doing well with me as his teacher.

He's lost 5 teeth now!  He looks so much older with his new big teeth.  There will always be a part of me that misses my kids being little as they grow bigger and bigger but mostly I am just so thrilled that they are doing just that.  Facing the reality of possibly losing a child has changed me in a lot of ways.  Life is so precious, truly a gift from God.

Here's an old video of Carter riding his IV pole like a scooter in the hospital.  It gets a little boring in there.

Summer update

We've been doing very well over here across the ocean!  I haven't updated for a while because I've been very uninvolved in the hospital/doctor scene.  And I love it.  Dennison has been on a break from school and so he's been taking him each month.  Carter has had two unscheduled visits to the hospital so far this year.  The first was when he fell off a little ledge at the park and banged his port.  There was a pretty big bruise right under it and he was in a lot of pain.  We took him in to make sure it was still correctly positioned and working properly.  All was well other then some soreness.  The second time was when Carter woke up with a fever.  He was on antibiotics for a week and his blood cultures were clean.  Other than that, it's been business as usual.  Still taking oral meds daily and visiting the hospital for IV chemo monthly.  I don't really even know what his blood counts have been for the past four months.  I assume they're fine and normal otherwise they'd change his medicine dosage.  Let me just tell ya, it's been a nice break from thinking constantly about it!  All the thinking and worrying hasn't changed anything in the past and it's quite liberating to let go a little bit.  I'm trying to just enjoy this time in France with my family and soak up all the goodness.  Dennison will take him two more times (they want to do a blood count check half-way through this month to see if they can increase his doses) then it's back to me.  I am so impressed with Carter and how well he handles visiting this hospital where there's very limited English spoken.  What a trooper he is!  I have a harder time with it than he does, that's for sure.

He's been doing great.  We've really been enjoying this summer and all the traveling and relaxing it has brought our way.  I should get a more recent picture of him because he's now lost FOUR teeth and two new ones are growing in!  He looks so different!  His little brother said to me the other day, "We're the luckiest family in the world!"  Amen my dear little one, amen.

Less than a year left!

 

 Packing up his toys to take to the hospital. 

Words cannot even express how happy I was to have these two go to the hospital this month.  I don't think it's any secret that dealing with the hospital here is a BIG challenge for me.  With Dennison having a bit more free time these days he was able to take him.  I was so SO happy.  They had a good time and everything went great.  Except for when Carter tripped on the way back to the car afterwards and scraped the skin off his forehead.  Ouch.

Other than one ridiculous bloody nose that took forever to get under control, everything has been going great.  Carter is feeling really good and is perfecting the art of teasing his little sister.  Life is good.

two hospital visits

 We went in for Carter's monthly chemo and check-up a few weeks ago.  Everything went great, but slow.  He's doing fantastic and is feeling great!

 

View from his hospital room.

 

 There's lots of pink in the hospital. 

 

This was when they were preparing to do his lumbar puncture.  They give him something similar to laughing gas which helps with pain and anxiety.  He did great of course.

Last week we were playing at the park when Carter somehow fell off a ledge, face-first, and hit his port on the ledge.  He ran over to me crying hysterically and holding his chest.  I was so scared!  I looked at his chest and there was a big bruise already forming right above his port.  I tried calling the hospital but no one spoke english and they eventually hung up on me.  I really don't like this hospital.  I had my french-speaking husband call later that evening once he got home from school.  The nurse asked what time the accident happened and then asked why we didn't call sooner.  Rrrrr.  I know I'm in France and I should learn French and I'm trying, but I really thought there would be more resourced available, especially at a hospital while dealing with very important health issues of my child.  Dennison took him in the next day to have everything checked out and it's all working perfectly still.   I felt so relieved that he is fine and also that I wasn't the one who had to take him in!  Thank you husband!

a replacement

What do these pictures all have in common??

 

 

 Besides Carter being in them all...

 

 

It's nothing cancer related....

 

That's right!  His precious blue blanket!  He has had that blanket since birth and it has always been his most prized possession.  It has been through quite a journey alongside Mr. Carter.  It was his constant sleeping companion.  It's been dragged through many a playdate and roadtrip.  Everywhere Carter went, the blanket was there.  He always HAD to have it with him.  And all those rough hospital days were made a little easier when he had his blue blanket.  As we journeyed to our new home in France, the blue blanket somehow escaped his possession.  I still don't know exactly where we lost it.  It was on the plane with us to Paris but I'm not sure it got off with us.  If it did, I'm not sure it left the airport with us the next day.  Or maybe it's final resting place is the train we took to Nice.  I'm not sure, but it's gone.  Carter is very sad that it's gone but I think I might be more upset about it than he is.  I'm a sentimental fool I guess.  That sweet blanket represents so much to me.  It reminds me of how brave my little boy is.  How strong and smart and thoughtful.  And now it's gone.  We've been searching for a suitable replacement ever since we discovered it's disappearance but nothing has been quite good enough.  One day while we were skyping with my mom Carter told her the sad tale of the lost blanket.  He promptly ordered up a new one from Grandma. 

Yesterday, this came in the mail:

 

He is so happy to have a new favorite blanket.  It hasn't left his sight since he got it.  As sad as I am to not have the blue blanket anymore, I really love that he's moving on to a new favorite blanket.  One reason we loved the idea of moving to France was to have a sort of new start.  Try to move past all the crap our family has been through these past two years and start to make new memories in a new place.  Now Carter has a new blanket to start with.  I like this.  I like the symbolism and I love the blanket.  Thank you mom!!