Carter is officially a kindergartner! I've been trying to prepare myself for this day all summer long. He has been so excited and asked nearly every day this summer when school would start. I thought he might explode from the anticipation. The closer it got and the more we did to prepare (school supplies, backpack, new clothes), the excitement just grew and grew in him and the nervousness in me. Then came back to school night. I totally lost it before we even walked into his classroom. Meeting his sweet teacher was more than I could handle and the poor kind woman was so sweet to this bawling momma. He drank it all in as we did a few activities and picked out a new book. I came home that evening thinking that my emotions had gotten the better of me but it was probably nothing compared to what the first day of school would bring. I was so nervous to send my sweet little guy out into the world. All the common fears of any mom sending their kindergartner off for the first time were on repeat through my head.
Finally, the much anticipated day came. Carter got up early and was dressed and ready to go with plenty of time to spare. Or in other words, time to wander around the house asking me when it would be time to go. I dropped off the younger two at a friend's house and Carter and I headed for the school. Suddenly, all I could think about was how grateful I am that he is healthy and well enough to be going to school right now. Yes, having a child going through chemo and also attending public school is nerve-racking to say the least, but oh so exciting. I've seen the little school room in the inpatient oncology unit and it's so great that it's there but I'm SO glad that Carter isn't having his first day of school there. I was overwhelmed with happiness and gratitude. What a triumph for our little man! He's overcome so much already, now he's ready for new challenges and adventures. He continues to inspire me and make me want to be better. Just thinking about all that Carter has been through to get here is incredible. He deserves to be involved in a normal thing like kindergarten. He had to fight for this. And he continues to fight everyday. So as we pulled into the school parking lot, something magical happened. The fear and nervousness disappeared and all I felt was happiness, excitement, gratitude, and of course, pride. When we walked into his classroom, I could tell the teacher was ready to comfort me and assure me that everything was going to be just fine, but I didn't need it. I was just so darn excited. Not to mention that his excitement was very contagious :). Now, I'm not saying that the nerves and fears are gone forever - they are most definitely not, but at that moment, when I needed comfort and strength, it was given to me. It was so fun to think all day about what he might be doing and I was so eager to hear all about his first day. I know that Carter has an incredible life ahead of him. This is a small step to his greatness.
Just got home.
(These pictures are in reverse order so if you're picky about that sort of thing I suggest you start at the bottom)
His teacher drew a heart on his hand "because I love Mommy and Daddy!"
When he first got to his classroom.
Waiting to cross the parking lot.
Killing time before leaving for school.
And for the record, he LOVED his first day! He kept remembering things to tell us all night long. He and his brother stayed up way too late playing in their room - they must have missed each other.
